Fear and Running in Bourbon County

I hate snakes.

HATE

hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate snakes.

Yeah it's almost kinda cool the way the little demons move without legs.
kinda not really

Yeah it's almost kinda cool the colors and stuff.
but not THAT cool

So I'm looking for arrows that missed the target yesterday. I borrowed a metal detector because if they miss they burrow into the ground if they don't hit a rock first. That makes them REALLY hard to find. Out of the four I lost, I found two.
Not terrible.
The two I found were actually in the tall grass a good 30 yards behind the target. So I wondered if there were more out there.

I wish I wouldn't of.

I went out into field to look farther.

I wish I wouldn't of.

I found a mating ball of king snakes.

I really really really really wish I wouldn't of.

I don't know if I screamed like a little girl or not but armed with a metal detector, I really didn't feel adequate to dispatch the slithery ugly spawns of evil. I set a land-speed record as I sprinted to the house, dispelling Einstein's theory of Time slowing down while approaching the speed of light. When I asked beloved rather urgently for the 12 ga shotgun, she didn't see what the big deal was. They were just snakes after all. Might I add that's not what she said when almost hit one with the weed wacker last year. YET i digress.

So here I am, back in the middle of the field, with the shotgun to my shoulder, trying to remember the difference between a king snake, blue racer, and a cotton mouth. I can see the trail I blazed through the grass, either walking out or flying back, and I follow that with the gun shouldered. I was moving somewhat slow to hear the hiss that I heard the first time that made me stop, except for now that there was a steady breeze, and the grasses all around me were making that noise, and kinda upsetting me in the process. I had eight shells with me and at that point I was about ready to use them all because I found where I had seen them earlier, but they weren't there now.

Meaning they weren't there.

Meaning they could be anywhere.

Meaning they could of diabolically creeped around behind me, or surrounded me waiting for the signal or were under my feet right now.

Meaning I wished at that point I had more then one gun and that they were both fully automatic.

So doing my best to aim the gun everywhere at once, which was scary and cool all at the same time, I slowly eased my way back out of the field. Note, I was trying to listen for sound but the wind was in the grass, and I was trying to look for movement but the grass was blowing.

I'm tellin ya if so much as a grasshopper would of tried to surprise me, he would of been vaporized on the spot.

Needless to say I didn't make it out of that field and am now dead.

I hate snakes.